Faithfully Yours Part 8: I'm always true to you darling in my fashion..   Chapter 67 "The good ended happily, and the bad unhappily. That is what Fiction means."   Oscar Wilde

Phoebe returning to work the next morning, had  a  very unpleasant morning, catching up on all the dramas that had happened as well as seeing the disbelieving expression on Elise's face when she produced a medical certificate for the time she had been away.

When she first arrived at work, she did not even make it to her office before five people rushed to tell her, some in fun, some with malicious intent, the latest John Cotton scandal. Her assistant Cheryl, all but fell on her to cry out her long woes from her “aberration” with the notorious John Cotton. Cheryl’s husband had found out but had been ever so slightly mollified by the fact that she had fallen for the big sport jock John Cotton, and while things were still rocky, they were together.

Only Cheryl wailed, after the scandal in the paper and all over the internet sites this morning, there was no way her husband was going to understand the attraction of the alpha male thing, he was just going to be straight nasty. Phoebe soothed Cheryl as best she could and then shuddered a little when she saw that a meeting with the advertising firm was scheduled.

As Phoebe knew exactly why George, the leader AKA the demon Honoured One of the Geztalt, was missing, it took considerable restraint to sit through the meeting while the changes to the advertising agenda were discussed with the new representatives and explanations for George's disappearance were made. They were new representatives were smooth advertising types, and their slick manner made Phoebe certain that they were demonic. As the pressure was put on her to go ahead with the tasteful nude pictures, she became very suspicious the Brotherhood and perhaps her not-beloved mother in law were taking over the advertising firm. Phoebe shuddered at the thought of what her mother in law would do with naked pictures of her, tasteful or not.

The meeting was not helped by the presence Jasmine, the other woman who had been considering posing for George and who had been Cheryl’s co-conspirator in meeting with John Cotton. Jasmine was alternatively sniffing away tears and bitching at Phoebe over her previous agreement to pose naked. Phoebe was unwillingly grateful to Elise for finally putting an end to the firm's involvement when she had  got Phoebe to admit that her husband had said a decided “no” and Jasmine’s tears had become more embarrassing than fun.

The rest of the morning Phoebe had a long queue of woman falling on her for advice about their boyfriend and marital woes, many relating to John Cotton. The scandal that had broke in the morning news made those who had got involved with him all the more foolish, although quite a number of the guys who had been pushed into second best were enjoying themselves at John Cotton's expense.

Eventually Phoebe found herself running to the bathroom just to hide form the talk, a good place to hide considering the pressure Pookie was putting on her bladder the last couple of days. She had the place to herself and took her time smiling to herself as she struggled to pull her knickers up and zip her jeans up.

“I know" she told the bump that was rapidly becoming a huge balloon. "I haven't been paying you much attention lately. I have been a bad mother but that won't happen again" she promised.

She struggled to do a few more  buttons up, thinking that regretfully the rather becoming purple ruffled shirt, that teasingly showed off the curves of her boobs as long as she a wearing an magic bra was going to have to be put in the wardrobe for post Pookie days very soon. If her body recovered enough from this pregnancy. Phoebe remembered that she was over thirty. And over thirty bodies did not bounce back so well from babies.

"Daddy better mean it when he says he loves me and not just well what I was before you and Patsy came along." Phoebe told Pookie "Not that I don't want you" she explained making last determined effort to get the jeans completely  zipped up. “It wouldn’t be so bad if I was tall” she told Pookie. “Grams was tall, Mom was tall. Pop is sure tall. What the hell happened to me?” and grinned to herself when Pookie could offer no explanation.

Phoebe opened the stall door and went crimson in embarrassment as she realised she was not alone in the bathroom. Alison the short plumpish and attractive in a girl next door way, photographer was washing her hands and clearly from the amused expression on her face had heard every word of Phoebe conversation with Pookie.

"They need to get used to you talking to them" Phoebe said red faced and shuffling awkwardly. Then she lifted her chin "Its important to enjoy being pregnant" she said.

“I know "said Alison smiling a little“ and its nice seeing someone happy around here.”

Phoebe nodded then sucked her lip a little guiltily. "Things went a bit crazy she said "and well crazy has consequences.

"Nasty consequences for some” said Alison. "That damn John Cotton started it" she said. "Bastard "she added “You sick of being asked about John Cotton?” 

Phoebe nodded slightly "He sure got around. Chances are they would not have been as crazy about John Cotton if things had been rock solid in their marriages. Wouldn't have… It may just have brought things to a head?" she said lamely.

"Like your marriage is rock solid." Alison said "You going to deny you got pretty heat up over him. Like me." she confessed.

"No I won't deny it "said Phoebe with a guilty little smile "but fortunately my marriage it is…solid. Cole is… actually pretty damn wonderful, understanding. He knows me. Pissed but understanding" she amended.

"Not bad to look at either" mused Alison.

'No" said Phoebe trying not to bristle "I mean yes. Look if you want some absolution for getting interested in John Cotton, because the truth is I can’t give it to you. John Cotton was  just a shit with a good butt" Phoebe said “who uses and abuses and some of us… got  a bit excited and let him.”

"Well” said Alison with a sting in her voice “The used and abused can get some satisfaction after this morning's news. I suppose the beautiful Mr John Cotton ain't going to have any ghost written columns in this paper" Alison said. Not without satisfaction. "Pretty sordid" she added.

"It’s not illegal" Phoebe said.

“It sure kills a girl’s fantasy" Alison said.

"Yeah" Phoebe agreed. "Its pretty hard to realise the fantasy is a … not worth the dreaming."

"You know I … I damn near did it Phoebe" Alison confided suddenly. "I damn near…. I went with him and I was going to. I was .. I wasn't thinking of anything else but John Cotton's great bum and imagining the rest. And there it was all for me. I wanted it so bad, I was shaking. I went into the bathroom with him there and I would have sucked. I would have…” she took a deep breath. "Only just at the last minute I .. I saw myself in the mirror. I was there in a bathroom. I was being.. I was doing …and I thought to my Tom and well he doesn't have a bum like that…."

"Prick" said Phoebe,

“Yeah" she said "But I never snuck off into a bathroom before. I mean Tom thinks …well of me."

"Yeah" sad Phoebe.

“I feel so guilty"' Alison confessed "I never in my life before, well fantasised why women do that but never wanted and Tom is a good man" she looked at Phoebe. “Shouldn't be talking like this. But … I can't believe I could… I did. It's not me doing that.”

Phoebe took a deep breath "I think things got a bit crazy" she said "we all got…excited. We all egged each other on and it… got out of hand."

“You didn't nearly screw him in a bathroom." Alison said "You didn't… lose all self respect. Nearly I mean…. I'm not the sort of girl who screws ... jocks in a bathrooms. But damnit it was exciting.”

She started to cry.

“Don't be so hard on yourself" Phoebe said putting an arm around her. “Thing got out of hand.”

Alison wiped her eyes "I had a lucky escape "she said “I hate myself "she added bitterly.

Phoebe took a deep breath “Me too" she said finally.

Alison looked at her in hurt shock.

Phoebe swallowed "I mean had a lucky escape" she said hastily.

Alison looked stunned. "In a bathroom?"

"His room" Phoebe admitted. "But I came to my senses. He got pretty nasty "she said.

"Yes” Alison said wiping her tears. “What … did you tell your husband?" she asked.

Phoebe bit her lip. “Yes" she said eventually.

"What did he say?" Alison asked curiously.

"He said I I wanted to go chasing fantasies he would rent a pirate outfit,. Phoebe finally said.

Alison started to laugh then she cried while Phoebe put her arm around her. Finally she said "So you think I should tell Tom?" she asked.

Phoebe took a deep breath "Honest as the sob sister here" she said “No. You didn’t do anything. You pulled up. You remembered who you were. You nearly made a mistake but…”

“But you told your husband" Alison said.

“Yeah but…Cole is .. he's pretty.. he knows a few things that most guys… don't. He's a lawyer and sees some pretty …bad stuff. He was a DA" Phoebe said. "He... I wouldn't expect the others to be…they aren't Cole" she said firmly. "You didn't do anything but  tease and pull up…Tom can still think well of you.”

"Yeah" said Alison sniffing "John Cotton was a real shitty when I said no"' she added.

"He's a real shit anyway "Phoebe said.

"Even if he has a great bum" Alison said clearly still thinking about it.

“John Cotton is a total a shit, bum or no bum" .Phoebe said firmly.

Both of them jumped as there was some clapping from the door and Jasmine the arts reporter was standing at the door. ."John Cotton is a total prick;' she said.

"You too?" Alison asked between sniffing tears back.

Jasmine sighed "I didn't stop” she said. “Like you two” She raised her eyebrows questioningly. Both Phoebe and Alison nodded. “You didn't sleep with that PR prick who seems to have disappeared either?" Jasmine asked Phoebe tartly

"No" said Phoebe firmly.

"He was pretty into the nude campaign and you" Jasmine mused.

“It isn't going to happen" said Phoebe.

“Because hubby wouldn't like it?" asked Jasmine maliciously.

“I wouldn't like it" Phoebe said "I'm 30. I look like a balloon, I don't feel sexy, I feel ... pregnant" she said "I'm no-one's fantasy at the moment" she glanced down at where she could not see her feet. “

“That’s not what you said to Elise this morning” Jasmine pointed out.”

Phoebe shrugged "Why should I tell Elise it wasn't the pictures Cole objected too. It was the sharing.”

"No the boys don't share their toys very well" said Jasmine ending the conversation while Alison turned to splash water onto her tear stained face.

Phoebe went back to her office and firmly shut the door. She tried to work but found her self think of Cole and fantasies. She frowned and then she grinned and stood up "Why not" she said to Pookie "Why the hell not? He says he wants me.”

Phoebe determinedly walked into Alison’s work space. "I need a favour" she said quietly.

"What?" said Alison clearly suspicious of the request coming so soon after the big crying scene in the bathroom.

Phoebe sucked her lip "I need some photographs" she explained "taken by someone I can trust. Special photographs of me."

“Like they were going to use in the campaign. That got around” Alison looked at her "Maybe you should have got them before you got so big" she said

"Now "said Phoebe "while I’m ..now " she said. She lifted up the purple shirt. "just me and . poo.. my baby”  she said. “Nothing else. Taken by someone I trust.”

"Special present for.. hubby" Alison asked raising her eyes "I've had this request before. Quite a bit lately.”

"They're for my husband" Phoebe said becoming uncomfortable. “He was pretty good about the other stuff so …I mean he needs ..something

“So that’s your answer to nearly straying” Alison said raising her eyes. “Well if it works for you. Come up to my studio after work" she said.

“I don't suppose you have a pirate hat at the studio have you?" Phoebe asked.

Alison stared at her.

“I can buy one on the way" Phoebe said.

Phoebe rather nervously looked over Alison’s shoulder at the computer screen. The photos, mostly tasteful and  a couple that weren't so much weren’t to bad. Alison was a good photographer. They showed her, Phoebe Halliwell Turner as herself They showed a naked 30 year old pregnant woman, a woman who had know love and evil and pain and  joy. A woman who understood sex but who had never quite lost her innocence. Phoebe shuddered a little with relief. The photos showed a woman not a heroine. And as for the rest, Cole knew she wasn’t perfect.

"Camera doesn't lie" said Alison examining the photographs critically. "I can make it lie though." She took a deep breath "I can airbrush them, I mean that  people do it all the tome. Make them:.."

"Not like me" Phoebe smiled "No : she said firmly  "Cole  knows I'm not perfect. He loves me" she said

Alison giggled pointed at the not so strategically held pirate hat "Pirates?" she said.

Phoebe nodded and then giggled too.

Alison raised her eyes “I would fancy that man of your in a pirate suit" she thought about it "I could fancy him without one.”

Phoebe s nose came up  "Fantasy all you like "she said sweetly "But keep you damn fantasy to yourself." She smiled suddenly "He wouldn’t be interested "she said gently very sure. "Enjoy your fantasies. Thank you "she said

Alison turned and hugged Phoebe” Thanks for this afternoon” she said “ I’ve been thinking maybe if Tom and I shared a few fantasies, I wouldn’t be …fanaticising about…shits."

“Maybe“ Phoebe agreed. “I’ll pick the prints up tomorrow.” 

………………………………………….

The following day Cole pushed a pile of documents into his briefcase and half smiled to himself. He glanced over at the quorum of lawyers at the opposition table and their faces showed their anger, outrage and fear except one of the juniors who acknowledged him with a wry shrug. Cole nodded. He was alone at the table. Erin was in court in case he needed anything but the client had stayed away.

"I'll be happy to get justice" the client told Cole. "Don't need to see it."

Cole was glad he was not there because seeing justice could take the glory out of getting it.  Phoebe had offered to be there but he had told her not too. She admitted feeling guilty she was not at court for Cole but still to raw from the last dose of justice she had seen served. She did not need a sense of premonition to know that the after effects of Burvjara would be there for  long time, "You don't need to relive Burvjara" Cole told her and she agreed a little to quickly.

"Call me" she said and kissed him.

The court room was slowly emptying of people, most of them shuffling out in uncomfortable silence. Erin who had been sitting half way along the spectator's area, stood up. The expression on her face, Cole easily recognised. It was the same expression he had seen on the faces of the witches in Burvjara, when he had taken a sword in his hand and administered justice on the warmongers. She looked at him deference, fear and discomfort. "You're dangerous" she told Cole as she walked toward him.

Cole thought about denying it and then he remembered Burvjara and awkwardly nodded. "I only go there as a last resort" he told her as she walked up. "When all other choices fail."

She nodded clearly uncomfortable. "I hate seeing that, I hate being part o it" she said as the opposition lawyers filed out, giving her the evil eye as they passed her.

Cole nodded understanding "Honest to god, I think you should hate it. Because I hate having to do it." He began packing papers "We better get back to the office. If I'm late this time I'll never hear the end of it." he said trying to sound light.

Erin took a deep breath and then matched his tone "He was very sweet to me when you didn't turn up the other day.'

"You aren't me" Cole muttered, as he stood back to let her pass through the court room door ahead of him. She frowned at him.

As Cole followed Erin out some-one called "Turner " and he swung to face one of the old time reporters, an old guy, something of a legend around the courts, who had been reporting there for forty years.

"You have anything to say about what happened in there?" the reporter asked.

Cole shrugged "Justice was served" he said.

"Sonny let me tell you that in the forty years I've reported around here, that was the bloodiest version of justice I have ever seen." the reporter told him "Justice and no mercy."

Cole stoped "They gave me no room for mercy did they?" he snapped "I kept hoping right until the last minutes they would …give me some room."

"What did you want from them?" the reporter asked curiously. "If justice was the last resort."

Cole shook his head "Some sort of righteousness "he said "Some form of acknowledgment of what they had done." he said "Some form of human decency."

The report laughed "If that is what you needed, did you think you had any hope of avoiding a bloody massacre?"

"While the possibility exists, there is hope" Cole said noting Erin beside him sucking her breath.

"Can I quote you?" asked the reporter.

"Might kill my reputation as a tough guy lawyer" Cole replied with a half smile "But what the hell. Go ahead."

"After what happened in there" snorted the reporter, "More likely the next time, they will be so frightened of you they will becoming at you shooting before you can pull out that bloody sword of justice you keep in that brief case.'"

Cole laughed again and shepherded Erin toward the elevator.

"So "said Erin as they went in the lift "Next time how you going to dodge the bullets?"

Cole grinned "I've got a few tricks left" he said.

He stopped in the hall to call Phoebe while Erin went to the ladies. Erin had glowered at him in annoyance when he politely said he would wait.

Cole called Phoebe at work to let her know he had won and she asked "How bad?"

"It was a blood bath" he said shortly. "Phoebe" he said, as she was silent.

"You got them good?" she asked finally.

"I got them good" he told her.

"You do know you're my hero'" she said.

She knew he was smiling the smile for her as he said "I need to be reminded every so often," he whispered.

"It's damn sexy with that sword in your hand" he said "even the metaphoric one."

"So I've been told" he said.

"Only" she said

"You don't have to see it in action" he said "Or feel it. Phoebe do you think I want someone "I love as much as you to feel that

"No" she said her voice catching "I love you" she said.

"I do need to be reminded of that too" Cole said as she ended the call.

Erin came out of the ladies disgruntled at Cole, good mannered not showing annoyance at waiting for her. She sucked her breath when he said he had a pregnant wife and was used to prowling outside bathrooms.

They went down to the car park and Erin shuffled a little awkwardly as he took the brief case from her and opened he car door for her. She got in but glowered at him.

He put both his and her bags in the car and got in.

"Look Cole" said Erin as he drove off. "There's something I need to say.'

Cole braked to hard as he pulled up to pay for the parking. He threw his credit card at the attendant.  Then drove out far to fast

"What "he said as he speed up the street and Erin caught her breath "because if that sort of stuff is frightening you into quitting, we need to work out. ..something. Erin" he said "I know I was not to thrilled about you coming, but only because it pisses  me off when the family make me do what they know I need. Just " he said "things have been crazy for me lately and .. family stuff and ..Its not going to get any better and … damnit I need you." he said "I don’t think I can keep the practice going.. I mean…"

"Thanks...I think" she said sourly "but that was not what I was going to say."

"Oh" he said slowing down.

"I was going to say I'm a big girl and can open car doors by myself" she said "The manners are nice but its not necessary."

"You want me ti change who I am" he asked a little to sweetly.

She glowered.

"You're a big girl but I'm an old fashioned boy." he told her "I had a mother who drummed the… ah… manners into my head and it's to damn late to change now."

"Your mother expected you to treat her like a delicate helpless female" Erin said.

"Helpless. No my mother is not helpless" Cole said amused at the idea "My mother is…believes she is entitled to all the consequence and courtesy going and… is not afraid to demand it. And by god I learnt very early it was easier all around to give it to her.

"Oh" said Erin "If she was such a bitch..."

"She had her charms" Cole said to dryly.

Erin was silent then asked "Would she be proud of what you did back there?"

"No" said Cole firmly. Then he shrugged "She'd have enjoyed the massacre but not the reason, " he thought about it "And like to damn many, not good people, even ones who think they are good, when it comes to the blood letting, she would not have understood that they made their choices justified, their choices were all that mattered."

"So your mother is not…good?" Erin asked clearly chosing not to argue justice with him.

"I think the only time Good and my mother are on speaking terms is when she thinks she can use it, manipulate it, savage it to get what she wants" Cole said. "And she usually does get it."

Erin shuddered at the dryness in his voice. "That sounds…"

"Evil" said Cole "yes"

"It's a terrible thing to call your mother evil" Erin said "to hate her."

"Yes "said Cole 'but I don't hate her. She's my mother. I love her and I still open doors for women" he said firmly. "My mother has a sense of entitlement, that is not …unattractive" he said "So does my wife. Well at least she has a sense of high maintenance.'"

"So what are you saying?" Erin demanded.

"That its okay to think you deserve to have doors opened for you" Cole said. He shrugged "That' its okay to expect it and not every good man is dead."

"Who asked you to interfere?" Erin demanded.

"When you get involved with my family you'll find out no one waits to be asked to interfere" Cole grinned.

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