The Life and Times
Part 5: Of a good beginning cometh a good end.
"To expostulate why day is day, night night, and time is time,
"When shall we three meet again
In thunder, lightning, or in rain?"
(William Shakespeare Macbeth (I, i, 1-2))
In the early hours of the morning after Willem was vanquished and Patsy received his powers Cole was woken by a call from a client whose elderly and quite well off mother had been caught shoplifting chocolate bars from an all night shop again. He promised he would go and arrange for her immediate release.
"How?" asked Phoebe sleepily watching him get dressed. "Isn't she still on bail from the last time?"
He half flicked his fingers "When all else fails."
"Isn't stealing, stealing?" Phoebe asked in a sleepy voice. "I have some sympathy for the shopkeeper you know."
"I have some sympathy for her son." said Cole "Getting screwed over by out of control family." he added with a grin.
"Very funny "Phoebe said yawing.
"Patsy's asleep "Cole said as he bent over to kiss her, just as she moved to look and he connected with her eye. "God Phoebe," he muttered.
"Just asleep? "She asked trying to peer around him.
"Yes," said Cole "On his tummy, 3 inches above the bed."
Phoebe dozed off and when she woke Patsy already wide awake was playing levitation spin around three toys he pulled over to his cot.
"Clever Patsy" she said brightly, feeling it was better her son did not get any negative vibes about his magic. She watched him play swallowing hard.
"Hasn't gone away over night?" asked Piper from the door, her voice hopeful.
"No" said Phoebe trying not to keep the panic down.
Melinda bounced in past her mommy, saw Patsy playing with the toys in the air and telekineticed them from him. He pulled them back and Melinda hung on, until the toys fell apart mid air. Patsy spun a plastic skittle from the corner of the room at Melinda and Melinda sent a pillow from Phoebe and Cole's bed at Patsy.
Piper froze the skittle and the pillow midair, and Phoebe pulled them to her.
"What am I going to do Piper? "Phoebe pleaded "How am I going to raise an out of control magic kid whose more powerful than me?" she sobbed.
"You asking for my advice?" asked Piper jumping to stop Melinda dumping Patsy's cot mattress upside down with Patsy still on it "Because gee I don't know, anything about raising him remember," she snipped. "And its not like I have had an experience raising an out of control magic kid more powerful than me."
Melinda started to raise her hand.
"Out of this room" Piper ordered immediately "No Patsy "She said firmly as he nipped his fingers to pinch Melinda's retreating behind. Melinda stopped. "Now ordered." Piper.
"Piper," pleaded Phoebe.
"You want to know what I've learnt from Melinda" said Piper.
"Yes," pleaded Phoebe.
"Muddle through" Piper told her. "Melinda" she roared as there was a suspicious noise coming from the landing. She went out and found Rodik slapping himself as if he was being attacked by something crawling over him.
"Melinda" said Piper.
"That child is evil" said Rodik stopping slapping realising nothing was wrong.
"Ahhhhhhhh" whimpered Phoebe as a teddy bounced off the ceiling and Patsy clapped his hands.
In the kitchen, Paige, ready for work, was drinking coffee. Leo had disappeared off to deal with Durand's latest blunt talking to dragons and trolls. Phoebe fixed breakfast for Melinda and Patsy while Piper fed Wyatt ; kids come first; then the witches decided they could no longer put off calling the whitelighter.
They had a long discussion about Patsy where Paige argued Patsy's magic was not something Elders needed to know about, and Phoebe weepily agreed. While the witches were talking Patsy and Melinda entertained themselves thumping a soft ball around the kitchen no matter how many times it was taken from them. They put Melinda in front of the TV in the living room and Piper feeling a little icky doing it, froze Patsy.
"We can't keep doing this" said Phoebe even, more weepy as she watched her frozen baby.
"We can until we work out some way of controlling a baby with that power," said Paige firmly.
"Or Willem's power to get out of a freeze turns out to be good one, and Patsy learns to use it" Piper commented dryly.
So Piper in jeans and a sweater, Paige in her screw you suit because she had a long day dealing with budgets at the employment centre or more correctly dealing with people who did not want to give her budgets and Phoebe still wrapped up in a bath robe called their whitelighter down.
Kitchener and to Paige's joy Mark arrived. Kitchener/Not-Casper stood looking grave as they explained that they got Willem, missing a few details that they thought were not suitable for whitelighter ears.
"Who was hurt? " he asked as soon as he heard Rodik came out of the freeze.
"Clarissa was beaten up a bit " Piper told him, "Thanks to Rodik interfering. I froze him but the sniff of the powers must have brought him out of the freeze. Phoebe's right. It is almost jerk off for him to take them."
Not-Casper snorted." If you are saying that to get me angry with you, it won't work. I agree. I'll check with Clarissa's whitelighter."
"Called her this morning. She's sore but okay. Husband is not happy with us though." said Paige.
"And so Willem is really gone." Not –Casper seemed almost not to believe it was over.
"Plus about 20 lower minions hose names we didn't get" said Phoebe," so it may be an idea to use whatever it is you use to track warlocks and finds out which ones are gone."
"Good." said Not-Casper "Rodik didn't get the powers of any of them?"
"No" said Piper defiant "We just got rid of the warlocks,
"So I have to tell the Elders the powers are lost to good. " asked Not-Casper."
the witches glanced at each other.
"I guess that is what you will have to tell them" said Piper, not quite meeting his eyes.
Mark looked grave but said little after greeting the witches. He stood so he was slightly outside the group glancing occasionally at Paige with a certain longing in his eyes,
"And what do I tell the Elders about how you got him?" Not-Casper asked.
"The truth" Piper answered with a level of tension in her voice.
"We worked out that we got it wrong the first try. We had to get rid of the evil powers before the potion and spell worked." Paige said with a side ways glance toward Mark who raised his eyes.
"And getting rid of the evil powers first?" Mark asked "This will work on other warlocks. The Elders could suggest that to other witches."
"Worth a try if nothing else works." Phoebe answered carefully while Paige bit her lip.
"As simple as that" mused Not-Casper nodded again "And there was I assuming that you did something I would not approve of or you would have informed me before you went after him."
"We weren't waiting for your approval or opinion this time " insisted Piper sharply "It was our call."
"Aren't you going to lecture us on the bloody powers?" demanded Paige.
"No" said Not-Casper "If Willem has gone and no witch was killed I am going to take it as a blessing. If no whitelighter has to mourn a lost charge then I say thank you and congratulations, " and he bowed slightly.
Mark stood to one side and sucked his lip. "I take it Willem did not have Belthezor's powers in the end?" he asked almost too casually.
"No it was just a warlock chasing powers, using demon myths about the old source to raise its profile. So when is Rodik going?" asked Phoebe with a hopeful flirtatious smile.
"What happened to the evil powers?" asked Not-Casper, ignoring the flirting.
"The whore's demon took them to use for evil" screamed Rodik from the door. "They're holding me prisoner " he screeched. "They gave all the powers to Belthezor and they're going to use them, I heard them talking last night " he said. "Belthezor is going to take over the world."
"Bloody liar" said Piper. "You heard no such thing."
"You ask her," Rodik screamed pointing at Phoebe. "She knows what happened to the evil powers. She and the demon were talking about what they could do."
"Prick" said Phoebe because she wasn't on very safe ground. "Why don't you just do magic a favour and get yourself killed?"
"I can help if you want" offered Paige sweetly.
"Take me away they want to kill me" Rodik begged the whitelighters. "Something terrible is going to happen to me if I stay here."
"We can only hope" said Phoebe "So you better go now." she said brightly "Don't even pack. We'll send it on."
"You only want me to go so you can kill me some where else and the Elders won't see through your game." Rodik sniffed "They want to kill me to stop me telling the Elders what I know."
"Everyone want to kill you" said Not-Casper. " What you makes you think you're any worse off here?"
All three sisters noticeably paled.
"I demand to talk to the Elders," Rodik sniffed slyly. "At her tribunal today. The Elders have to understand that this who…"
"Where's Cole?" asked Piper looking around.
"I can call him" said Phoebe.
"Witch "Sniffed Rodik "All these witches are evil.
"That doesn't sound anything new to me" said Not -Casper smugly "so I doubt your presence will be needed."
"He has a right to be there, to be heard if he feels he has something to say Kitchener, regardless of what any-one personally thinks of him" Mark said softly. "Witches have been known to go evil, and those closest to them have not been able to see it, because they haven't wanted to. As I understand it, sometimes a less involved person sees things that those who are close do not."
"What " screamed Paige unable to restrain herself.
"Rodik has a right to be heard, and have his words judged as Phoebe has a right to be heard and have her words judged." Mark said softly refusing to be intimidated as all three witches glared at him, especially Paige. "If Rodik has wants to put his credibility to the test he should be heard. You know I'm right, Kitchener" said Mark still soft. "And" he told the witches "the more you try to stop him speaking, the more validity you give to his claims."
Kitchener turned his nose up and then with extreme distaste said "I know. I'll inform the Elders," he told Rodik his voice bitter and clearly less than pleased with Mark.
Rodik suddenly happy, smirked and then it must have occurred to him that he was in mortal danger if one of the witches wanted to kill him. "They'll kill me" he screeched. "To stop me telling the truth."
"I wouldn't blame them," sighed Not-Casper while the girls pointedly ignored Mark, Paige sniffing loudly to make sure he knew he was being ignored.
"I can take it that I have your word no misfortune will happen to Rodik in the meantime " Not-Casper asked the Charmed Ones ignoring Rodik.
"Well we won't hurt him" said Piper with an expression on her face that would have scared demons into self destruction.
Rodik seeing her expression, fled while Phoebe giggled and even Paige forgot Mark had betrayed her for a second to smirk.
"So you'll take our word." Piper asked Kitchener, impressed.
"I believe although we have had our differences I can have faith in your integrity" Not-Casper smiled "If not in your judgement."
"Well you shouldn't," said Phoebe honestly. " We've had some personal agenda. We've all been taken over by evil at some time" she glanced at her sisters "So you should be less than trusting when something seems unusual or suspicious. I wouldn't be happy if you took …our integrity for granted. "She told the whitelighter " Only this time there is no evil and he's not in danger. Damnit," she cursed.
"I see," said Not-Casper.
"Anyway if Angela did not believe Rodik, maybe the Elders won't" said Piper.
"Perhaps," said Not-Casper " but Angela is not an Elder Elders rare there because of their wisdom.
The whitelighter purposely ignored the witches expressions of disbelief.
His voice carefully bland he continued "Sometimes the Elders see things in places and find truth in places others do not"
All three sisters snorted.
"And this hearing isn't just about Rodik's temper tantrums." Kitchener told them "Its about the 'aura' of Belthezor that hangs over the Charmed Ones." He took a deep breath "I'm sorry Phoebe but I tried to warn you that your less than honest responses would sooner or later be a problem."
"You did." Phoebe agreed quietly.
Kitchener nodded. "Whatever happens, I want to say how beholden I am to you that you took out the warlock and its minions and no whitelighter is grieving a charge. Which may not be the opinion of others up there. Coming Mark?" he asked pointedly.
"In a second," answered Mark who obviously knew he was in trouble and was characteristically prepared to face the witches wrath.
"How could you?" yelled Paige " How could you put Phoebe in that situation."
"Of lying." Mark said. "She doesn't have to."
"We vanquished Belthezor," said Piper furious.
"Oh for god's sake, he isn't vanquished now." Mark said in a soft pleasant voice "Belthezor is alive and well, sleeping in Phoebe's bed and playing arsehole lawyer and you all know it."
"You…" Piper started to say.
"Don't call me a bastard." said Mark mildly "Cole is Belthezor and he is being guided by a whitelighter with whom I once shared a very pleasant Christmas dinner. A whitelighter who I just happened to recognise as one the great powers that be not so long ago. One that the Elder s are so in awe of they all but fall to the ground when she passes."
The girls exchanged nervous glances.
"And." continued Mark "As she does not seem to be making any effort to stop this tribunal, and as a paragon of good she could not possibly expect you to lie, then for god's sake why lie?"
"Because I am frightened of where the truth will lead Good." whispered Phoebe.
"Telling lies seems to have lead to a mess where Elders at least are so scared of Belthezor reincarnating there is a risk they will do something that from my lowly level looks rash" Mark pointed out.
"I have told the truth" said Phoebe "As much as I could."
"No you haven't Phoebe "Mark answered softly "You've told a number of half truths that were meant to be lies. You knew it and they knew it, and it only takes a shit like Rodik to prod the paranoia about a resurrected evil, and the whole thing is out of hand."
"Rodik is more or less telling the truth Mark" said Phoebe. "You have no idea of the consequences of telling the truth."
"Do you?" said Mark still gentle "Rodik isn't telling the truth. Any more than you are. He is just exaggerating what he thinks he knows because he is starting to get the message he isn't that important. His case is that you're evil. Is that true? Belthezor is alive and evil. Is that true? Because it sounds along way from the truth to me.
"To damned close for comfort" said Piper.
"The truth is more dangerous than you know Mark "Paige told him.
"So is a lie" said Mark "You think they are going to rely on their estimation of Phoebe. Because if it did I can tell you, she's damned before it starts. Fortunately for her recognising truth is a power held by some beings of good." he added. "Fortunate as long as she tells the truth anyway.
"Are we supposed to know that? " Paige asked.
"Know what?" said Mark softly. "But I would advise Phoebe to assume that a lie or a half truth will be recognised. And I would assume that there will be those expecting a lie and who will want to act on that lie, because Phoebe lied regardless of why she lied. There are some who feel it would be better to damn Phoebe and perhaps even the Charmed Ones," Mark explained as they glared at him.
"Why would they want Phoebe be damned, and us?" demanded Paige.
"Because there are some Elders who confuse the Charmed Ones ….impatience with the Elder's belief in their own goodness with a rejection of good and its values." Mark said carefully "And would prefer there be a parting of the ways."
"So if it doesn't go away today" Paige asked. "Some of them could want to act on their…. confusion."
"There will always be those who will want the Belthezor legend to be true," Mark said. "Whitelighter 101. But if they cannot justify their concerns by Phoebe lying or find any other credible evidence, then in lieu of credible evidence, Belthezor remains just that. A legend."
"Except you know what Cole is," said Paige sucking her lip.
""I believe I know what Cole is" said Mark gently "I have no credible evidence. There is no reason to ask me. Rodik has not even seen me in the same room as him."
The sisters nodded and stood not quite sure what to say.
" Just a junior whitelighter's advice," Mark said. He swallowed. The witches remained silent "Can I asked something Pet?" he finally said.
"What?" said Paige snappishly because she was not sure how to react.
"What the hell are you wearing that god-awful suit for?" Mark asked quietly.
"Because I have a god-awful meeting with the finance committee over funding, which I am about to be very late for," Paige answered still unhappy. "And I need the image to go into the battle."
Mark hesitated "Want some advice, pet?" he asked still soft.
"Why not ?"Paige said spoiling for a fight "You're so full of it."
Phoebe and Piper exchanged glances.
Mark chose to ignore Paige's temper "Be sweet, don't fight them agree with them," he told her.
She stared at him and then slowly remembered what he had done for the employment centre she worked for.
"How does that help?" she asked "Get the money I mean."
"In my experience any-one can shoot down reasons why you need the money " Mark explained "If they are mean enough. So arguing or fighting is useless. But if you keep them talking long enough they'll kill their own arguments, especially if they feel you're a little …interested and talk themselves into handing the money over. You get more flies with honey?" he said.
"Are you suggesting "I lower myself to I flirt and use sex to manipulate them?" demanded Paige. "Do you know how hard I've worked to be professional?"
"Works for me" said Phoebe but was ignored.
"What's it about? Your ego or keeping the centre going. Does it matter how you get it as long as you get it," asked Mark "I had to take a lot of crap to keep the centre going pet."
"But you had the slush fun and real figures to blackmail them with "Paige said. "And that did it"
"I thought you would have worked out how to get into that by now." said Mark clearly disappointed in her.
"What's the password?" Paige asked.
"Fuckwit" said Mark.
"That's an awful thing to say to Paige" said Phoebe ready to defend her sister.
"Shut up Phoebe," said Piper crossing her arms.
Mark shook his head, and sighed.
"Oh" said Phoebe.
"Damn I tried fuckwits," said Paige "One little s. I was thinking of the committee."
"Sorry I was thinking of the committee chairman" said Mark smiling.
"He's okay" said Paige "He likes my legs."
"I knew there was away to handle the prick, I was not getting. I don't think mine would have worked somehow" said Mark. "Damn it. "I better go."
The witches nodded.
Mark started to orb and then stopped. "What happened to the powers?" he asked gravely.
"None of your damned business" said Phoebe defiant.
Mark just smiled, his grey eyes amused not perturbed by her belligerence "Did that truth hurt?" and he orbed.
"Don't even say it," said Paige. "Shit, I have to go to work. And I have to change. " she stopped "Are sure you don't want us with you Phoebe?" she asked quietly "We can say you aren't going if Piper and I aren't."
Phoebe shook her head. "The more people the more questions they can ask. The point is protecting them not us. Damn them. Why do people who think they know everything know nothing?"
"The eternal question" said Piper smug.
Phoebe stopped suddenly, as if it just occurred to her. "Hell she," she muttered." The nerve of Mark. He doesn't know any more than the Elders."
"He wasn't trying to pretend he did." Piper said slowly "He was telling you how they would react."
"Maybe I don't want to know" snipped Phoebe "Why couldn't one of us fall in love with some-one who just shut up and agreed?"
Paige and Phoebe exchanged glances and both smirked at Piper.
"What?" said Piper.
"No, that didn't work" Phoebe told Paige, " When Leo was our whitelighter we nearly turned evil trying to destroy Cole."
"What?" said Piper furiously insulted then she swallowed. "Leo had grown since then she said.
"I have to go" said Paige quickly and orbed to her room.
"What do you mean I've grown?" said Leo as he orbed in and glanced at himself in the mirror in the kitchen "You know Patsy's smashing toys against the wall in the parlour" Leo asked.
"He's frozen" said Piper.
"He's not frozen" said Phoebe paling as another plastic toy disintegrated.
They all went into the parlour, where Patsy had unfrozen, slide himself to the floor and found his way to the toy box where he sat with the lid open and the floor surrounded by broken plastic.
"He's just feeling his power," said Phoebe "He doesn't understand. He just reacts."
"Looks like he understands to me" said Leo as Patsy carefully selected the next toy he wanted to smash.
"He's just using the first power that comes into the his head." said Piper," Melinda is telekineticing. He copies her. He doesn't understand."
"If you say so" said Leo. "Are sure he only got good powers?"
Piper told Leo about Rodik wanting to see the Elders and Mark's advice." What do you think the Elders reaction would be if Phoebe told the truth?"
"We're still protecting the Elders not Cole " Leo said. "Pity Willem didn't use that damned memory spell on Rodik before he was vanquished. Patsy no" he finally roared as more plastic cracked.
Phoebe poured herself a coffee and then sat down on the chair "Don't yell at him" she said. "he doesn't understand." and ignored Leo's expression as the noise volume went down.
"Damnit Piper " she said suddenly "Its not fair."
"No" said Piper.
"All I did was fall in love " she said. "You know the world evolves around falling in love. I fell in love with this good man… creature, who has a great destiny and it seems all the world wants to do is damn me for it,".
"All the world? One or two trillion don't care " Piper told her snarkily "And you fell in love with smart arse demon lawyer with a great butt."
Phoebe turned her nose up. "What's so hard to believe about I fell in love and lived happily ever after." Phoebe demanded ignoring Leo and Piper's glance at each other.
"Yeah" said Leo "but read your literature. All the great love stories are tragic"
"Give it time," said Piper with a sly grin"
"Isn't going to happen" said Phoebe seriously. "Its going to be ever after," she told them deciding to get it all out "I love Cole " she said. "And you better know , no matter what happens today, I think I may find a way to be with him while he has to stay."
"You're mortal Phoebe," Piper said firmly but taking her hand. "And mortals die. Its the natural order."
"But its not the end." Phoebe explained. "There's a way to stay. Some things are written, like how Old Phoebe dies in the spirit winds out of reach of the Elders. I can stay there."
Leo and Piper exchanged glances.
"Its eternity" Piper said "Cheating eternity. That's unnatural."
"Its not everything but." said Phoebe "it's a way and I'm only going to spend eternity fighting the Powers that Be to wait for him, at least this way he is not alone and…".
"It will just be you and him and." Leo interrupted.
"Cole really exists in the spirit winds," said Phoebe " and Piper we're happy alone. Honest apart from anything else we have fun together, going around Europe and Disneyland and just being together. We have fun. He needs me Piper, " she sucked her lip "Leo, he needs me."
"He wants this? " Leo demanded almost angry.
"No but he's going to get it" said Phoebe bit her lip "I don't think he would do as well as Arturo living on memories alone. He needs to know I'm there. I saw some things" she said in a switch, with Francesca, I saw what it is like for her to be so long alone, to be ….unanchored. and I saw what fixes it."
"What fixes it?" Leo asked.
"It's a secret" said Phoebe." Francesca's secret " she said."
"You could end up like Isis and her lover. Cole spending a thousand years looking for a way to have sex." said Leo exasperated.
"So we won't do it that way. But at least I know you can exist. And it possible to materialise when you're a spirit creature. Melody the muse we found a way to give her some corporal form" Phoebe argues.
"She was in the room not on the spirit winds," Leo said firmly.
"Details" said Phoebe, then she stoped. "Gives me and idea. I'm thinking." said Phoebe. Remember Halloween Cole could time travel, those demons could materialise."
"He was evil" said Leo becoming exasperated "They were evil."
"Maybe I can us Halloween magic" said Phoebe ignoring him. "Or work out the way they did it. "I've got fifty years " she added.
"So one a year you can materialise." Snipped Piper once a year you get sex. You can … Live with that."
"Its just a starting point, maybe other choices, the more I think about spirit creatures who can materialise." Phoebe answered. "Maybe I can get Cole to tell me how he does it.?" Phoebe said. She eyed Piper contemplatively. "So you think Cole has great butt " she mused. And to her delight Piper flushed red.
Phoebe picked up Patsy" Come on Whosit we're going to fill in time waiting for tribunals, looking in the Book of Shadows about managing magic kids. and assorted powers."
"This conversation isn’t ended "Piper called after her.
"Yes it is "Phoebe called back.
"Managing kids or finding eternity?" Piper asked Leo.
Leo shrugged irritated "So Cole's got a great butt?" he asked.
Phoebe spent the morning searching the Book of Shadows for the powers Phoebe knew Patsy had, and only got distracted by the possibility of spirit beings materialising once every twenty minutes or so. Patsy sat on her knee and seemed to be fascinated by the turning pages. Some of the powers she read about were manageable, two of them, the enhanced learning and the ability to spot evil, like the transgleaming and ability to see through solids Patsy had accidentally got when Phoebe took out a warlock when she was pregnant were something that only came with puberty. Something very wise she thought, a baby being able to see evil all around it would find the world a very frightening place. Then she thought about the joys of dealing with a 15 year old boy on hormonal and magic power overdrive and shuddered.
"That's what daddies are for," she told Patsy "To provide role models for oversexed teenagers." She thought about it "I don't mean it that way" she told Patsy firmly.
As she read about the memory power, she frowned. It was a power that was granted to witches to help them mediate and help others move away from resentment . It was based on empathetic connection and could not be bound because it was so firmly based in the emotional makeup. And Patsy was naturally empathetic. It was the small human magic that was his father's mortal inheritance.
"Great " she said "I've got a kid who can make me forget anything he wants to make me forget. And nothing I can do about it. Pity you can't use it on Rodik and make him forget daddy's little secret."
"That's the problem" she told Patsy "Its all very well Mark muttering about telling the truth because with good the truth will solve everything. And he may have point to a certain level. But if those sneaky morons up there do have some sort of magic lie detector, when Rodik starts bitching that daddy has been teasing him with magic, they're going to know it's the truth."
"Bah" said Patsy.
"You might be right "Phoebe told him "But I think Good being the hypocritical idiots some of those Elders are won't believe teasing Rodik and not killing him is proof daddy isn't evil."
"Dadda" said Patsy.
"I know "Phoebe answered "If it was just the Elders who would fight daddy, I'd say just go a head and blast them. They're no damned use anyway. Aunt Prue was right "She said "But it will be good witches they send into battle while Elders sit back and watch them get killed."
Past made a whimpering almost sympathetic noise. He waved his hand and the Book of Shadows pages flipped, stopping at the page on retrievers. Phoebe noticed for the first time a small print warning about the dangers to creatures who come into contact with great power but cannot use it.
"Thank you "Phoebe told Patsy gravely "Uncle Leo thinks you do that on purpose butt I think you're just letting the magic take over how you're feeling." She cuddled her son "Could you?" asked Phoebe suddenly bright. "Could you empathise enough with mommy to make mean old Wodik forget daddy?"
Phoebe stood up, clasping Patsy against her hip. "Well it can't hurt to try." She walked down to the first floor landing and banged on the guest room door. When Rodik did not answer, she went into Piper's room, found the spare key kept in there, which Rodik did not know about, and let herself into his room.
Rodik was meditating, snoring on his bed, wearing very baggy grey once white boxer shorts and a singlet over a skinny sunken chest which Phoebe noticed in repulsion had long grey chest hair hanging out of it. The room was a mess because no-one in the family had done anything other than throw clean sheets at Rodik once a week and he clearly considered cleaning his room a task to mundane for a retriever.
"I hope you plan on cleaning up this room before you go." Phoebe said to wake him.
"Get out of he witch whore," screamed Rodik jumping off the bed and backing away "I'm not frightened of you."
"All evidence to the contrary" said Phoebe.
"Your demon phallus doesn't scare me either," hissed Rodik.,
"Well he doesn't scare me either so we have something in common." Phoebe replied brightly, hoisting Patsy on her hip. Patsy glanced around the room and turned his nose up.
"You admit it " screamed Rodik""
"Of course I admit," said Phoebe "Cole's got a great phallus."
"I hate you" Rodik yelled.
"Put your pants on" said Phoebe and waited while Rodik slung forward to find them, to her amusement turning his back to zip them.
He spun around. "You wait until I tell the Elders the truth. You won't be laughing then." Rodik told her as Patsy picking up on Rodik's hatred gave him the evil eye.
"Actually" said Phoebe as Patsy glared "I've lately been advised that telling the truth will be the solution to all my problems. So yes I admit it but I want you to forget it."
"Forget it. I'll damn you for it," Rodik told Phoebe as Patsy eyed him with disgust and blew an irritated bubble on his lips.
"Belthezor Rodik" Phoebe softy chanted, to her surprise she could fel the power in her son. She kept saying. "I'm begging you Rodik. Forget Belthezor "And she half smiled as Rodik launched into a long tirade about the demons she was bedding and she kept interrupting saying forget Belthezor, and every time she said it Rodik got nastier and swore he wouldn't and Patsy spat irritated bubbles until he finally blew one that was almost a spit and flung his hand out hand a green light seemed to surround Rodik .
He flung his arm around Phoebe's neck and buried his face against her as Rodik stared with a curious blank experience.
"I have very clever son "Phoebe informed Rodik "I'll leave you now , leave you with your memories. She said as Rodik stared at her blankly.
"I guess we'll find out if that worked later precious " she said to Patsy "No need to tell daddy. He'll just get pissy."
"Dadda" said Patsy and smiled.